communism with a happy face

I remember soon after finally reading 1984 for the first time was when I first saw V For Vendetta. I was floored by the film, and was stunned to read later that the film's main villain, played by John Hurt, actually played Winston Smith (the polar opposite of his V character) in Michael Radford's 1984 film adaptation of, well, 1984. So obviously, I had to find it.

After much searching and waiting, I finally got a copy...and couldn't make it through more than a half hour before I had to turn it off. Maybe it was the slow Orwellian pace, or maybe it was just being exposed to Suzanna Hamilton's huge bush far too early in the film. But I think just the drab, dark nature and pace of the film made it hard to watch. Obviously its supposed to capture the dark, drab ethos of totalitarianism, and covering it up with happy, cheery images would certainly not be totalitarianism, would not be fascism, would not be communism.

Or could it be? Take a look below:

Care to venture a guess as to what this is? Perhaps just the desktop of a Chinese rabbit enthusiast?

No, this is the Green Dam Youth Escort, a new mandatory computer software instituted by the Chinese Ministry of Industry and Information Technology, that requires that all computer manufacturers shipping CPUs to China install this software, which acts as a filter to censor certain websites, track web uses, and create web logs of any computer in the entire country.

Yowza.

Chinese authorities claim the filter is mainly to censor online pornography...but one thinks that if you were to Google "Tiananmen Square" on your new Chinese-market Macbook, or search for the Beastie Boys at the Tibetan Freedom Concert on Youtube, you may only get articles and/or pictures on Mao back...and a friendly red flag would go straight to your neighborhood Ministry of I.T.

Now, while the program was halted the day before execution earlier this month, and is now on the shelf indefinitely, obviously state control over all forms of media still runs rampant in China. Sure, they may not have figured out the way yet to censor every computer in the most wired country on Earth, but the situation is still quite drab...so begs the question: why doesn't China look like England circa 1984?

Or better yet, how can China rule with a ruthless communist fist when everything looks so cute?

One wonders whether its just the influence of the Japanese on the Chinese government, or whether Hu Jintao and Co. have stumbled on to a brilliant masking device, to make the dystopia that is China seem like quite a cheery one. Rather than the bold, intimidating Agitprop ads that made the communist Soviets, the facsist Nazis and early Maoist China famous (or infamous), the new regime in the PRC has resorted to children's marketing techniques to enforce their brutal laws.

These are the friendly faces that evidently greet you whenever you try visiting an "indecent" website nowadays...no word on whether they will stick around when Green Dam launches, or whether actual Chinese cops look quite as giddy all the time...

It's just mind-boggling, frankly, to see that of all forms of communism that are still surviving, this is how the healthiest (if that's the word) communist state enforces it. Is it just sheer ignorance on the part of the Chinese people to buy into friendly anthromorphic characters, rather than menacing caricatures of state leaders? Or is it that outsiders may not see China as harsh as other totalitarian states like North Korea because, obviously, the Chinese can embrace cute and cuddly communist critters?

You wonder whether Cuba could turn it around if they made Castro a bit more animated...literally and figuratively. Or could the USSR have been saved if the front page of Pravda every day featured a sweet cartoon telling how the capitalist American pigs are trying to nuke your apartment and take your bread?

Adorable cartoon characters, masking their true evil intentions of world domination behind a soft and cuddly exterior...I do believe South Park has covered this before.

You really Are Not Alone

Just finishing my most recent vacation, "Detroit-ing" over the Fourth Of July weekend (let's see how many posts I can slip that into!), I will always have the image in my mind of visiting Hitsville USA, the original home of Motown Records, on July 5, a mere ten days after Michael Jackson's untimely death, and the day before his public memorial. Shots of the memorial across the world often cut to the front lawn of Hitsville, strewn with flowers, pictures, stuffed animals, and notes memorializing Michael. And to know I was there at that time is quite a memory to carry.

Unfortunately, that memory will also carry the part of where my girlfriend and I wandered in my car down West Grand Boulevard, struggling to find parking, because the main strip in front of Hitsville was swarmed with trucks, vans, SUVs...all hawking MJ gear.

Now, I'm obviously not surprised at the notion...you knew it was coming. No matter what the tragedy, whether it be 9/11, Katrina or the death of a superstar, someone stands to make a fast buck from cheap merchandise. The morality behind it is another issue altogether.

But now the promotions company that was sponsoring Michael's comeback tour has decided to go ahead with the release of the merchandise they were planning on selling all along, so fans who would have seen him live (or perhaps not) can still have a souvenir for what could have been. The ethics behind this are obviously much more well-intended than those dudes who just set up folding tables in front of Hitsville, but its still a bit morbid nevertheless.

Especially when you consider one of the items up for sale...now, you've got your normal run of the mill shirts, mugs, CDs, et cetera. But then there's the Dangerous Sleep Mask, selling for 15 pounds:

It would have still been creepy before he died...but now? That's just messed up. Especially considering any fans here in North America will have to shell out well over $30 to get this thing shipped from the U.K.

Just imagine rolling over every morning and waking up to the already weird, manipulated eyes of a now-dead celebrity staring you in the face...does this remind anyone else of Homer Simpson's awake glasses while on jury duty (but obviously much, much creepier)?

I wanna do bad things to you...

I've been stalled a bit over the last few weeks, between Detroit-ing (yes, I've made up an adjective for vacationing in Detroit) and launching the Citizens For Colberta Coalition, my life mission to hand over the reigns of Alberta to Stephen Colbert...don't ask, just go to the site.

Anyhow, an interesting pic I found floating around, by the production guys who make up the fantastic opening video to True Blood, blending perfectly religious iconography, racy porno, and perhaps the only country song I like that's not Johnny Cash or from a Tarantino movie.

Fascinating to think about, no? Now if only we could see where Bill Maher signed his name...