Miss Confederacy 2009!

If it seems like I know too much about this topic, that's because I actually did get stuck watching the Miss USA pageant this past weekend...don't ask me why.

But it was quite hilarious to watch the Miss California controversy unfurl, the chaos that can only be found when an openly gay writer, sitting on a panel of liberal-leaning Hollywood types, asks a bible-thumping Cali blonde her thoughts on gay marriage. Of course, you've all seen the response by now, the backlash, the name-callings, etc etc. Perez Hilton thinks Carrie Prejean is a dumb bitch, Carrie Prejean probably prays for Perez Hilton while he will, in her mind, burn in hell for all eternity, and Michelle Malkin is undoubedtly hot and horny by all the talk of gay-bashing and First Amendment-defending.

And through it all, plenty of the other Miss USA competitors are likely breathing a huge sigh of relief.

Not because they were thrust into the spotlight into such a manner, but more because they managed to dodge said question from Hilton. While I can't speak to the topic with the full facts, as researching 50 other beauty pageant competitors at work is not technically considered "billable time" (I, of course, beg to differ), it is probably safe to assume that at least half of the competitors are of a devout Christian background. And while they may not have announced their thoughts as bluntly as Prejean did during the show, many probably agreed with her statement, and the cheers in the crowd from the families and friends of the competitors drove the point home.

So I ask, is anybody truly surprised? Not so much with Prejean herself, but surprised that a pageant chock-full-o' Jesus freaks would slam gay marriage in any way they can? Especially one where the top 10 finalists are from predominantly red states (Arkansas, Arizona, Kentucky, Texas, etc.), and where the winner herself, a North Carolinian, was forced to dodge the question when asked later on. And especially for Prejean, who likely ticked off Yes on Prop 8 (next to her checkmark for Sarah Palin) just a few months back, the memory is fresh, and her "crusade" against the gays is all but necessary in her miniscule mind.

This is not to say all the pageant competitors are bible-thumpers: in fact, many of the competitors (perhaps most surprisingly the delegate from Utah, of all places), seemed to have a less religious, more solid head on their shoulders (likely because said head included a brain). I am just saying that most of them are. And while I agree that what Prejean said is wrong, this is what you get when you have Hollywood liberals asking right-wing Holy Rollers questions of faith, in a Vegas hotel (a.k.a. "SIN" City), which in fact just a small-blip in the otherwise gun-toting, red-blooded Silver State.

And of all places, on a Donald Trump-sponsored paegant. Because let's remember what this pageant really is all about: finding Trump's eventual replacement squeeze for Melania.